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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Then there's the neighborhood near Stary Zarechny. Not many know it but me, I always grab a wasted coffee there. The locals, oh man, they're a blend of mad artists and losers with dreams—customized personalities that are as rough as the pavement itself. There's a little bar on Pushkin Street too, where the jukebox purrs out melancholic tunes, and I swear, the spirits are whispering, "blue is the warmest color." Reminds me to keep asking questions no one wants the answer.

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